Labels are nothing new to mankind and have existed since what seems to be the beginning of time. Masters, slaves, upper class, peasants, tax collectors, thieves, whores, jocks, potheads, bible thumpers, band nerds, just to name a few. I couldn't forget my favorite two though that have been near and dear to my heart from a young age: preppy and antisocial people.
"Preppy Bitch" was my favorite label from childhood, which was given to me in the seventh grade. In seventh grade I switched schools to attempt to follow my dreams at the time to be an actress. The "friends" I had at the time didn't see it as an opportunity to grow but as an opportunity to torture me by making me feel out of place and being the peppy bitch. They say sticks and stones may break your bones but names will never hurt you. Well I'm calling bullshit on that one. How many times have others words hurt YOU more than their physical action? Exactly. I was labeled as a preppy bitch because I had a dream and I tried so hard to make it come true until the dream and passion was driven out of me. I fought for that dream a long time but eventually let the words and names get to me until I let it go a few years ago. Even after I returned to the old school with my friends I held the label for 3 or 4 years, or until they finally forgot about it. It was a funny joke to everyone except me. What made me preppy? Or a bitch in the seventh grade?
But by far the most hurtful, and the one label I believed the most and almost became was antisocial. Up until even this year I didn't feel like I fit in anywhere in school. I came into school the new kid in November of the my third grade year. Everyone had their friend groups made and I had a heck of time trying to get into a friend group. I did meet a group of girls out of my desperation for friends. I was the runt of the group, the one who was thrown under the bus, the one bullied just to "fit in." What would you do in this situation as a child? I felt like everything I said was laughed at and ridiculed. All I wanted to do was fit in like everyone else and unfortunately I had to become a liar to even get people to look at me. I hated elementary and sixth grade so no wonder I wanted to switch school so quickly, I wanted a new start. Sometime during my elementary years I thought if I stopped talking I couldn't get blamed or get in trouble for things. The teasing and bullying continued until I felt emotionally shut off to my peers at school. If I didn't feel anything I thought it wouldn't be so bad. So people began to call me antisocial in sixth grade because I still wasn't like everyone else, closed off and quite, scared of the people around me. I never acted out against the social norm, I followed everyone else in hopes of not doing something wrong. I longed for friends and to be social but I was held back by my very real fears of humiliation and rejection. Up until freshman year I believed the lie I was told that said I was antisocial. I thought the fact that I only had one or two good friends I was doing something wrong when everyone else had a whole group. I kept to myself a lot dreaming of the future just to make it through those lonely years. (Side Note: I did fit in at the summer camp one or two weeks out the summer that I still attend today. I have made so many amazing friends through that beautiful place.)
Tonight the word antisocial was thrown my direction and for that split second all those feelings and memories of those lonely dark years flooded through me. I flinched feeling my name lost to the exact label I have been fighting so hard to overcome. We shouldn't lose ourselves to who we were or the mistakes me have made. For four year I allowed my name to be replaced by being called a preppy bitch and antisocial. I am McKayla Audrey and I am neither of those things. Do you know what I am? I am a Child of the King.
"God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ. This is what he wanted to do, and it gave him great pleasure."
No one likes to be labeled because we are all our own person not to be meshed in with everyone else. So if we don't like it then why do we continue to make such a big deal about it in movies, TV, conversation, gossip and life? The only reason I can see is that it is a way of life that people aren't willing to let go of. It seems comfortable to categorize things and people without knowing them or their story. I challenge you though to think and reach out to that person who you think is awkward or unapproachable, or that you could NEVER be friends with and learn their whole story. Labels are comfortable. Step out of your comfort zone and before you take away someones name, think, ask and learn their story. Only few people are able to see the transformation I have made from UNSOCIAL to a person who loves being in relationship with others.
I am McKayla Audrey a child of the King, forgiven, beautiful, strong, remade and never alone....
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